talk! talk! talk!

hello my friends!! i see we are enjoying a HEATWAVE again!!! LOL I LOVE NY!!! just not so much at the moment!! as i have stated a few times in my previous blogs i have had the opportunity to meet alot of new people lately. and everyone seems to be looking for answers to something or from someone. even myself. i always seem to want answers. it could be something simple, or something complex-like matters of heart. none of us can ever figure those out. it just is what it is!! so we talk about it and we talk about it and after awhile, if thats all you focus your energy on it becomes negative and you miss all the other great things happenening around you. life is too short so maybe its time to stop talking about it...

sometimes when we are quiet the answers we have been waiting for find their way to us. we can't always use words to find our way our through the darkness. sometimes all you can hope for is some good conversation while you are figuring it all out. and maybe, when you have no words left at all, you're right where you need to be. because sometimes when you stop talking...thats when things really start.(men in trees)

until next time...safe journey.

self awareness

hello my friends!! today i seem to be doing some soul searching and searching for self awareness. we all do that from time to time as events unfold in our lives. the world is made up of so many different kinds of people and personalities that its hard sometimes to figure out where you fit in. and try as hard as you want-you are not going to fit into every situation, so you just have to make the best of it, learn what you can and move on. for those of you who know me well know that i have a habit of opening up my heart and trusting way to easily, way to quickly. thats because i see the best in everyone. and thats not going to change, i just need to tweek it a little bit LOL!!! maybe think of myself a little bit more. but i think its a gift, my posative outlook, and when god gives you a gift like that you can either choose to close yourelf and live in a place of fear, or you can choose to believe in the best version of yourself no matter what happens. i choose the best version. so i have a quote on searching for the self today:

for every being cursed with self awareness, there remains the unanswerable question...who am i? we struggle to find meaningful connections to one another, as a friend, father, mother, or lover. we fight, and we love in the hope that somehow, together we can understand our signifigance in the universe. but in the end, no one can share our burden. each of us alone must answer the question...who am i? and in the vast infinityof time, how do i matter? (heroes)

until next time...safe jouney.

saying good-bye

hello my friends!! i hope everyone is well on this fine sunday morning!! i was chatting with a friend the other day who was telling me how unhappy is in his relationship. i asked him why he was still there, and he did have a real solid answer. just that he was used to it. i met another person last night who had rercently ended an unhappy relationship...that she will probably go back to, simply because she was used to it. we do that. we stay in unhappy places unwilling to try something new because we are used to what we already have. we feel safe. break our routine and plunge into the unknown? OH MY!! that would involve taking a chance! starting all over. maybe getting hurt again. THIS hurt we have already learned to deal with. but come on people! without the possibility of pain, there can be no possibility of joy or real love. so here is today's quote and from a most unlikely source-the tv show ungly betty-hey she said it best:

i've had to say good-bye more times then i would've liked. but we can all say that. and no matter how many times we do it-it still stings. and though we'll never forget what we've given up, we owe it to oourselves to keep moving forward. what we can't do is live our lives always afraid of the next good-bye, because chances are they're not going to stop. the trick is to recognize when a good-bye can be a good thing. when its the chance to start again.

until next time...safe journey.

history lessons!

hello my friends!! did you miss me?? LOL since i have started my class i have had waaaayyyy less time then i thought i would..no thats not a typo!! i am going to try and at least put 2 blogs up a week...and todays blog is inspired by a conversation we had while we studying for our big test yesturday that we took today. i have a feeling i am going to be saying that ALOT! LOL!! i have made some great new friends that i already feel close to and have already learned alot from. we all have baggage and we all have history. as far as baggage goes-and many of you have heard me say this, its not about losing youor baggage (like the airlines do LOL), its about learning to carry it gracefully. but history...well thats important. history you learn from. people say, "oh don't bring up the past." well you can't deny it either. because those who deny their history-which is where our baggage comes from-well they are doomed to repeat it. so as we sat there studying, and learning bits and pieces about eachother, we shared some of our histories. and the most important thing i could see in all of there faces-aside from what we were learning in class, LOL-was that they had learned some hard life lessons that had made them the great people they are today. and that's what its all about. so, today's quote (this quote goes hand in hand w/thoreau's quotes about castles in the air):

history can be messy and painful, but its not our destruction. if we're lucky it's our foundation. you just have to work your way through the mess to find what matters. to find the pieces of your past you still want to carry with you. and sometimes if you have just the right view, and just the right castle, you can build the foundation for your new history.... (men in trees)


until next time...safe journey.

falling in love...ugh!! LOL

hello my friends!! whether you are single or not i think it is fair to say that falling in love rarely involves the brain LOL..right?? i heard this quote and i wish i could remember where but i don't so i can't give credit..but it says

the bigger your investment, the bigger your return. but you have to be willing to take a chance. you have to understand you might lose it all. but if you take a chance, if you invest wisely, the payoff might just surprize you.

if you invest wisely. hmmmm, that implies that you did your research, weighed your options, and NOW you are ready to dive in. LOL. it means you used your head and not your heart. if we actually did that to chose our mates then maybe we wouldn't see such a high divorce rate? of course i am only guessing here, just my opinion. but thats not really the way it works and we all know it. we use our hearts and thats why they get broken. making decisions with our heads are the most difficult, whats best for the kids? the marraige? best for me? you all know what i mean....hence todays quote:

perhaps the most difficult choices to make are the ones that deny us those things that our heart wants the most. because it has been said without reason nor prudence the heart wants what the heart wants, and more often then not it will not be denied. (in plain site)

the heart has no reason in which reason knows nothing...blaise pascal


until next time...safe journey.

looking for a sign?

hello my friends!! are you enjoying the heatwave?? LOL...i can't imagine that there is anyone right now who has not heard about the tragety in haiti. it wasn't enough that they suffered the first tragic earthquake, but yet another one took out the airport where the US was flying in supplies.( i heard that on the radio so i hope i have my info correct.) between that, the war in iraq, and the many other senseless brutal acts of violence that happen in the world, i am sure at times we all look for a sign from whomever you consider to be your higher power, to let us know that they are there for us, right? sometimes we are looking for something so big that we miss the little signs right in front of us. like me for example, quite some time ago when i had one mishap after another in my life and all i could say was my me, why is this happening, my very dear friend on the other side of the world-the bones i call her-said to me, talk to your angels. we all have them. but they can't help you unless you talk to them and ask them to help you. it took me awhile to believe her but as i began to listen to her instruction more an more, and following my spiriuality, i ended up finding out who i am, and that everything happens for a reason. even the crappy stuff that makes no sense at all. so if you need help figuring it out, then call for help. i hope in someways my friends i have been your earthbound angel, but there is a song by the group train that says it best:

i need a sign to let me know you're here
all of these lines are being crossed over the atmosphere
i need to know that things are gonna look up
'cause i feel us drowning in a sea spilled from a cup
when there is no place safe and no safe place to put my head
when you feel the word shake from the words that are said
and i'm calling all angels, i'm calling all you angels

i wont give up if you don't up

i need a sign to let me know you're here
'cause my tv set just keeps it all from being clear
i want a reason for the way things have to be
i need a hand to help build up some kind of hope inside of me
and i'm calling all angels, i'm calling all you angels.


until next time...safe jouney.

foundations

hello my friends!! all we are-we are. and everyday is the start of something beautiful. for the longest time in my life i felt like i was treading water, with no direction. so i asked my angels for guidance-an actual person here in close proximity to teach me and i met janet. (and in another blog i am going to tell you about the beautiful persosn who intoduced me to my angels, she is a HUGE part of my life, but she already knows that, Bones!) and janet showed me how to turn my negatives into posatives, live in the now-and everything i needed was right in front of me. so i looked around. and started to surround myself w/people that are likeminded. we seem drawn to eachother even if we don't know eachother-but i acatually started with my own friends and family-SURPRIZE!!! yep there they already were. now don't get me wrong, i am human. i have my moments. there are days when i still feel lonely or like i don't fit in. but they are few, and far between. i have started building foundations, right down from the chiropractor dr jim dougherty, who not only fixes my back but is a spiritual friend as well, to a great person i met in my new class who amazed me in one conversation...all you have to do is look around you and go from there. it's not always easy, but its worth it.

thoreau wrote:
if you build your castles in the air, your work need not be lost. that is where they should be. now...put the foundations under them.

until next time...safe jouney.



thoreau

whats on your mind!!

hello my friends!! still freezing our butts off i see LOL!! so i couldn't sleep last night (those of you who know me really well are going "yeah and??" LOL), i thought i heard this noise and that noise, and i made up all kinds of senerios in my head as to what it could be, and by the time i was done i found myself lurking around the corners of my house with a baseball bat in one hand and the dog right behind me probably thinking, "WTF?!!" my niece lisa(who is more like one of my beauiful sisters, of which i have 2)and i had this conversation not that long ago about the thoughts in our heads being our downfall sometimes. we let our imaginations get the best of us and it kinda wrecks things before they even get started. i know i have talked myself either into or out of many things this way. i don't think anything, but imagine everything , and it is those imagings that cause me great distress. and i have a few other quotes that go w/that:

there is much to be afraid of in this world. but what we fear the most has nothing to do with gruesome masks, spiders, or even the lifelike monsters that go up around halloween. its the thoughts in out heads that terrify us the most. "what if she comes to regret her decision?", "what if he really is unhappy?" "what if the chance for love has passed forever?" (author unknown)

emily dickenson wrote:
one need not be a chamber to be haunted. one need not be a house. the brain has corridors surpassing material place.

until next time...safe journey.

wish upon a star!!

hello my friends!! all this talk about the blue moon lately got me thinking about wishes!! alot of us are always wishing for different things. i wish i had a new car, or a better house, better job. oh here's some big ones..more money, the love of my life...blah blah blah LOL..the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence. but what i have realized is that once i hop the fence its the same color, and it still needs to be mowed!! trust me i have first hand experience in this! thats not to say that a little more money wouldn't help around here anyway! so choose wisely when you wish. i found this quote from grey's anatomy that i though was great...so here it is...

we all love to lose ourselves in a good movie. when i was a girl i loved "the wizard of oz." especially the moment when dorothy opens the door into that fantastic world. but once dorothy appreciated how bright and beautiful everything was, she had a bit of a mess on her hands. one of the classic examples of "be careful what you wish for." spend 5 minutes in a fantasy and you just might find yourelf wishing for your old life back. we miss what's right in from of us when we're looking over the rainbow. but sometimes it takes stepping into someone elses world to realize how much you love the life you have. because no matter how magical the movies are, at the end of the day there's no place like home.

until next time...safe journey.

what do you mean??

hello my friends!! TGIF!! i was chatting with a friend the other day-or texting rather, and we realized that what we were trying to say had gotten lost in translation!! ever had that happen?? and it wasn't the first time or the first friend really that had happened with, where we were texting along and completely misunderstood what the other person was saying or trying to say. i think our communication skills are sadlly lacking these days. texting is fun...absolutely!! i'll be the first to say that i am addicted!! i'd rather text then talk LOL. but no matter what the form of communication it is up to us to be heard and understood...

the mind is a funny thing. its the place from which everything else eminates yet no one else can access anyone elses. which means we've got to communicate. with animals we only use the most straight forward language. words like, "sit", "stay", "no". but between one another things quickly get complicated. what we say is not always what we mean. and at times we have to fight through mixed messages or start all over again. but no matter how hard it is and now often we feel misunderstood, it is our responsibility to keep fighting for clarity. because in the end we teach people how to treat us, which means the responsibilty to communicate lies not on the shoulders of others but ourselves. (author unknown)

until next time...safe journey.

how much is too much??

hello my friends!!! its a brand new COLD day LOL..ya even i have to face the truth today on that one!! lately i have had the the very good fortune of meeting some new people. which is both exciting and difficult, no matter what the capacity. could be someone i am going to date. could be just someone i hope to have as a new friend. the point is, that things have changed out there and how do you know what you should share about yourself?? can knowing too much be a turn off? should you be an open book or are some things better left unread??

there's an old saying, "what you don't know can't hurt you." but is that really true? or can the things not said today haunt you tomorrow? everyone knows the truth can be painful-but it can also set you free. its a risk you take whenever you open yourself up to someone. i for one think honesty is worth it. and who knows you just might be pleasently surprized. (men in trees)

until next time...safe jouney

do you remember that??

hello my friends!! are you enjoying this sunny 90 degree weather here in beautiful central NY?? WHAT?? you mean its not warm outside? hhmmmmm, apparently i see things differently then you do!! as i was making my way through the holiday seasons as best i could i noticed that alot. we all do alot of reminiscing. hey remember this? remember that? and i kept thinking....was that really the way it was?? i remember something entirely different!! even my owm memories had holes in them LOL..i think that we remember what we want to remember-what we choose to rememeber, it should be the memories that makes us happiest. for most of us anyway. memories are very delicate. they are sometimes what gets us through. and i was watching the tv show heroes last night and they seems to bring that to light when they said:

there are many ways to define our fragile existance. many ways to give it meaning. but it is our memories that shape its purpose, and give it context. the private assortment of images, fears, loves, aand regrets. we choose the importantance of each. building our own unique histories one memory at a time-hoping the ones we choose to remember wont trap us. for it is the cruel irony of life we are destined to hold the dartk with the light, and the good with the evil, success with disappointment. this is what seperates us. what makes us human. and in the end, we must fight to hold on to.

until next time...safe journey

the other side!!

hello my friends!! ima back!! (are you laughing sister?? lmao) i have great friends!! i have great family!! and i love being on the other side!! i had so much fun last night just laughing and being myself!! but as far as the man/woman reltionship part of the other side, well i'm not so sure about that yet. i've been single for a long time, an quite frankly i'm ok with that. i know alot of people don't understand, but i really am. don't get me wrong, yes i get lonely....but my side of the bed is my side of the bed, and don't touch my tomatoes LOL. i guess that means i really haven't found the one yet because a friend of mine pointed out that when i don't mind sharing my tomatoes, then i know i found the one. so here is today's quote;

the truest thing i know about relationships is that we don't know anything at all. you can't always get the one you want, and sometimes the one you get might not be the right one at all. but if yu have hope the universe has a funny way of showing you exactly what you need. the challenge is to let yourself be alone until the right one shows up. ( men in trees)

until next time...safe jouney

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

hello my friends!!! its not just a new day!! its a whole new year!! we enetered into it on a blue moon..full of amazing energy!! you've heard the epression "once in a blue moon!" right?? well that blue moon was last night!!! the slogan for last year was lets shine in 2009!!! i don't know about you but i did my best!!! i think i shined for the most part LOL, no one is perfect so i am sure i had my dull moments! well i don't haave a quote for today...i am just glad to say that we made i through another year together. some of our relationships did not make it, and some of us have new ones, or are trying to form new ones, and most of us are just greatful for the ones we have-and when i speak of relationships i mean all of them, loves, families, and friendships...so here's what i have to say for this new year-this new beginning...if you shined in 2009 then lets do it again in 2010, if you didn't quite get there in 2009 then lets try again in 2010....

until next time...safe journey